The 6' 8" Russian oligarch and billionaire Mikhail Dmitrievitch Prokhorov, chairman of the conglomerate Polylus Gold and president of the Onexim Group has acquired the New Jersey Nets. The Nets (or as they are sometimes known, the Swamp Dragons), are moving to Atlantic Yards in Brooklyn year after next, and Prokhorov wants to change the team's name to something more germane. It's a monumental challenge to find the correct moniker. After all, what Brooklynite would be content with Brooklyn Nets, especially when the New Jersey team carries with a storied history of failure, mismanagement, and dysfunction. Who can forget the sale, for a few paltry bucks, 0f Dr. J himself?
Should the Nets be renamed the Brooklyn Dodgers? Too presumptuous by half. In honor of Prokhorov, how about the Brooklyn Billionaires? Not fan-friendly. Brooklyn Gold? Brooklyn Samovars? Brooklyn Borsht?
My good friend Otis Jefferson Brown proposes Brooklyn Eagles. I think it's a brilliant idea. It has history, especially for those who remember the Brooklyn Eagle (once edited by Walt Whitman -- 5 '11", 200); it has patriotism, it has style, and it lends itself to headlines -- "Eagles Soar Once Again"; "Eagles Tear Apart Hawks."
Unless someone comes up with a better name, I'm going with Brooklyn Eagles.